


I'm A Gem... Right?

by aNGELICmURDER



Series: It's August Though [3]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Disphoric feelings, Gen, Growing Up, Puberty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-06
Packaged: 2018-07-29 20:01:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7697629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aNGELICmURDER/pseuds/aNGELICmURDER
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steven begins to question himself and his right to call himself a gem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm A Gem... Right?

**Author's Note:**

> So what's posted is actually the happy ending. if I feel up to it I might actually post the originally planned ending. So have fun and let me know if it was alright.

Steven didn’t take notice of it until he was already seventeen. He and Connie both had started changing, with training from Pearl Connie had grown up to be tall, muscular and lithe, with a kind of grace Steven, for all his trying had never come close to getting. She usually stood with a straight back, balancing the weight of the new body additions, breasts. 

Steven questioned how long it would take him to grow breasts too. Logically he knew he was male, men don’t generally grow breasts but that was humans. He ate like a human, slept like one, laughed, ran and lived his life growing up like a human boy but he was still half gem and gems, they were all female. Pearl was a girl. Taller than most girls, flatter in the chest and more portioned like a guy than a woman there was no doubt she was female. 

Garnet was visibly female, curving in the chest and hips in the same way Steven had seen in the ads that played before his late night shows. Her voice was softer and husky but not like his that cracked and broke and bent at odd times going deeper than he was use to hearing.

Even in comparison to Amethyst, the gem that was closer in shape and size to him, rounder in body, and just as able to take a hit the same way even when his hair grew out to be just as long, Steven still carried a maleness that set him apart from all the other gems. 

Gems from Quartz, to Pearls, to Rubies, Sapphires, even the all mighty Diamonds, leaders of the gem worlds all looked more like human females than the body Steven was sporting, closer to his father and Ronaldo’s look. 

Peridot flicked a piece of the checker game at his head, eyes half lidded and lips pulled down in a frown. She drawled, “What’s gotten into you. I left three openings and you insist on taking none of them. Are you ok?”

“Umm it’s nothing.” Steven rubbed the spot in his forehead and looked up her. “That hurt you know.”

“I tried calling your name, you weren’t listening.” Peridot shrugged and started putting the game. “No point in continuing if you’re not interested.”

“Oh.” Steven started putting away the game too, using the new height he gained throughout puberty to put the game back in its original spot. “Um Peridot. You know a lot about gems right?”

Peridot snorted. “Duh, what kinda question is that?”

Steven held his hands up, flinching at the sight of how large each of his fingers were compared to how much smaller they were when he was thirteen. “I was wondering, since I’m a Quartz, do I look like a Quartz?”

Peridot sniggered but quickly quieted as soon as she saw the look on Steven’s face. “Alright kid, you look upset about it but you look like a typical Quartz to me.

You’re pretty big, bulky enough to take a hit on the battle field and as far as being a Rose Quartz you have all the right abilities, healing, defensive and you’re communicative. Typical of Quartz and your gem.”

“Oh.” Steven put his head down, a large palm coming up to rub his neck as he averted his eyes. So he was Quartz like after all. There wasn’t really anything wrong with him and he fit what his gem’s function was but… “I see, thanks Peridot.”

Peridot looked him up and down but didn’t prod or ask questions. 

 

It took a full week. One full week of trying to grip why he felt different in comparison to the gems around. He shovelled a hotdog into his mouth, taking half off in one bite as Connie dipped her fries in his ketchup, she laughed and kept saying something, Steven didn’t hear what was so funny, eyes focused on her hands; the fingers long and thin, delicate, attached to small palm, connected to a delicate wrist with just as much strength as his own hands. 

“Um Steven,” Connie waved her hand in his face and he grabbed, startled as she winced and pulled away. “Ow, what’s gotten into you?”

“Oh no I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He put his hands on the table.

Connie smiled and shook her wrist out. “I’m fine, I’m just worried about you, you’ve been more closed off than usual and when you asked to come eat here… I thought you were finally gonna tell me.”

Steven blushed, “Oh. No. I was wondering why we were so different?”

Connie chuckled, caught off guard by the question. “What? Well you’re a Gem, like a real Gem and I’m human.”

“No I mean.” Steven balled his fists into his hair and groaned. “All the gems are girls and I’m a boy.”

“Oh,” Connie looked away. “I didn’t know you went it like that. I guess, it would be better to ask the gems.”

Steven put his head down on the table, shovelling the rest of the fries in his mouth. “I guess.”

 

“So Ste-man, What’s up?” Amethyst plopped down on the bed, chaps in her hand and her feet dangling off the side of the bed next to Steven. He was hunched over, smacking his controller mindlessly as Lonely Blade slashed through his enemies in campaign mode. 

Steven set down the controller, letting the game beat the smack out of his avatar as he spoke to Amethyst. “Does reforming hurt?”

“Whoa, dude where’s this coming from?” Amethyst laughed. 

“I don’t know I just wanted to know.” Steven shifted his eyes and pulled at his collar, the air getting thicker around him. 

“You called me up here because you wanna know if getting Poofed hurts?” Amethyst rose an eyes brow. “You Pearl would be better to ask right? She can actually teach you stuff like that.”

“Yea, Connie and Pearl are training today, so.”

“Wasn’t that yesterday?”

Steven choked, coughing, “Oh yea, yea… Umm”

Amethyst slid to the floor to speak to Steven, the extra foot he’d grown over the year making it difficult. “Steven, you aren’t planning on getting poofed are you?”

“I don’t know.” He answered honestly.

“You can tell me, what’s going on?”

Steven crossed his legs under himself, pulling back a deep breath and tossing his head back to get his hair out of his face. “I wanna be a real Crystal Gem.”

Amethyst laughed, “Dude you’re already a Crystal Gem-”

“No I mean a real one!” Steven moved over and put his hands out for balance in front of him. “Like you guys and Connie and Bismuth. You’re all girls. You look like girls and everyone calls you guys girl but I’m a boy and people call me a boy and I don’t look like you guys!”

Amethysts frowned. “Oh. I didn’t know you felt that way.” 

Steven, rubbed his hands along his face and sniffed. They both sat down as the TV tried to prompt them with a new round of Lonely Heart.

“I just… If I’m a real gem, why can’t I be like you guys?”

“There’s nothing wrong with being a boy Steven, you’re you. You don’t have to be Rose.” She put a hand on his shoulder and patted it softly.

“But Mom was a girl and I have her gem.” His shoulders shook as tears began running down his eyes. “Peridot said it was normal for me, because I’m a Quartz, I look right but I don’t look like any of you, or mom.”

“You’re half-human.” Amethyst pulled back and waved her arms around. “I mean look at me. I’m a Quartz too and I’m not nearly as big as you are. I don’t look like a normal Quartz but I’m still a gem and so are you.”

Steven sniffed, “do you mean that?”

“Yea of course.” Amethyst grinned. “Us freaks gotta stick together right?”

Steven nodded, she was right wasn’t she? Even if he didn’t look like the rest of Crystals gems he was still a gem.


End file.
